Christmas Party Poem for Mamas

I wrote this too early in the morning two Christmases ago, and it should not be missed any longer.  

Twas The Night Before Spin Class

Twas the Night Before Spin Class and I was in bed,
my down comforter snuggled all the way up to my head.
My dreams were disturbed far too early I fear,
as I knew the time for an exercise class was near.

From my cozy warm bed I arose with a clatter;
some horrible sound and tinny talk patter!
I rubbed sleep from my eyes and stretched my stiff back
looking groggily at my clock alarm from Radio Shack

The lights were all on and the announcer was prattling
when I realized the alarm was going off, my sleepiness shattering
I spied the pile of gym clothes folded and neat
and I realized last night I'd attempted a feat

Attend the Mothers and More Holiday Party
with other Mamas so pretty
never got my chocolotini by the way, kind of...uncool.
We were all gussied up and made up in our best
our children by sitters and fathers and family put to rest
so we could enjoy being more than mothers and WOW were we HOT!

So my foolish feat of this day became clear
I was meant to go to spin class, Oh. My. Dear.
Five a.m. was quite early in the best circumstances but
thoughts of rich food and cocktails through my head...
that craziness prances!

My terrible friend Lindsay and my wretched pal Liz
both agreed we could make the class just as we is.

But we didn't.  NO WAY!

Bah HUMBUG! (& Merry Christmas)

Mama Goes Back to Work. A Little Bit.

Sometimes God sticks me in the most interesting of places.  A perfect job came up for me last week: a friend I admire and volunteer with at church was leaving her position and asked if I was interested in it.  I said yes, BUT I'd be interested in about two more years when both girls were in school full time.  That is my timing.  'Ol Padnah's timing, well it is a bit different.  So conversations were had and meetings happened and everything aligned so that I could accept a part time Interim position at my church for three months.  I went from afraid to thrilled, tentative to delirious with joy.  I believe when a person gives themselves over to seek God's will amazing things can happen.  

I will be the Interim Director of Connections at First United Methodist Church.  My job is First Impressions which means connecting people to each other and to God...can you IMAGINE?  Could I be better suited to any other job?  All of my faith and church experiences have honed me for this job.  My work life of fixing troubled teams and properties for The Sterling Group has prepared me for this job.  Learning to lead a ministry with Modern Moms has prepared me for this job.  Growing closer to God over the past eleven years has stretched me towards this job.  I feel prepared by God for this job the same way I was prepared for my husband John.  I can, in retrospect, see how all the pieces fit together to make me uniquely qualified to serve the FUMC congregation well.  


There are weaknesses in me too.  There is vanity and frivolity and overzealous passion for what I think is right.  These worry me.  A schedule, deadlines, and responsibilities deeper than folding socks scare me.  I need your help.  Will you pray for me?  Will you think of me as you may any mama heading back to work after a period of raising their babies?  Pray I am guarded from b.s (yes, that CAN be a healthy prayer) Pray that I am wise and never forget I am working FOR the people, not myself...that I am ultimately always working for God.  'ol Padnah.  Abba. Phil. (Ask Anne Lamott!) And please pray for my husband John, he will be a little busier with me working more.

I want above all things to honor God with my life by encouraging others.  I fail so often at this, and so I am a constant work in progress...and I covet your prayers.  

I will continue to do speaking engagements, lead Modern Moms and write the Live Your Love Out Loud blog. I will be working mostly when Portia is in school and Libby is in preschool.  The day Libby comes to work with me she gets to bring her lunch and she is over the moon about that.  I would love for this to become a long term job for me as it uses my gifts, pays well and has flexible hours that allow me to truly be present for my family.  We shall see how the next three months go, and what God will do next. I cannot wait!

p.s.  If you are local, even if you do not go to church or if you attend your own church I would love to get your candid feedback if you can VISIT our First United Methodist Church at 103 Franklin Street, Valparaiso, Indiana.  I'll be responsible for the volunteer teams that greet and usher and for the atmosphere for new guests so I would be fascinated to hear your take on things if you can spare an hour on Sunday.  8am, 9:15am and 11am Services.  

p.p.s. We have donuts.

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Tiny Red Kitchen: Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day That I Talk About More Than Jesus

OK Fine, here is how to make my fabulousy cheap easy healthy Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day whole wheat bread.  Since I talk about this bread more than Jesus, I figured I should make CERTAIN there was an easy to find post on it.  Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day.

I blame Jen Jones from my Valparaiso Mothers and More moms group for setting me on this path.  A few years ago in playgroup she innocently said, “I made bread last night and we ate it all...”.

Thems my kinda words.  I’m a sugar whore first, but I am also a bread girl.  I bake bread.  I EAT bread.  So I asked her,

“What kind of bread did you make?”


Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day.  Four ingredients.  You stir them together and have dough that keeps for two weeks in the you can have fresh hot steamy bread anytime.  Cheap healthy simple bread.  No chemicals, preservatives, just fresh whole food.  I have also posted about turning it into pizza dough.  And Indian naan.  Shaping it into an Epi Loaf. And cheddar pepperoni bread. STOP. IT.

(NO, I WON”T!)  Whole clove garlic bread.  Kalamata Olive Bread. Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day.’t.knead.  Buy the books, there are several in the Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day series.  I make mine with whole wheat flour even thought they have a slightly different recipe and process for whole wheat using wheat gluten something.  I tried it after making it my way and still prefer my simple bread. I have shared this Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day recipe with many friends who have gone one to make it themselves with delicious results so even if you are NOT a baker...try it.

Make it your veryownself:

Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day starts with these four ingredients: 

6.5 c flour
3 c warm water
1.5 Tbl yeast 
1.5 Tbl salt 

Stir all of the above together in a large lidded bowl.  Leave partially covered two hours.  Makes four one pound loaves.  Use it anytime over a two week period.

Flour your hands, sprinkle flour over part of the dough, whateveh....pull 1/4 of it out of bowl, and shape it into a loaf, round, long whatever.  

Sprinkle cornmeal or nonstick spray a cookie sheet, baking stone, whatever (start to see the ease here?) and set loaf on it.  Let rest /rise 20-30 minutes.  

Sprinkle flour on top of Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day loaf and cut 3-4 1/2 inch deep slashes across top with a serrated knife. Make a pretty pattern if you want.

Oven preheated to 450 and set another cookie sheet/ metal pan with HOT water in it (about one cup?) under the rack your bread will go on.  Put bread into oven for 30 minutes.  

Remove from oven let cool a bit to set crust. If you can stand it.  I cannot.  I eat it RIGHT AWAY. Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day is HEAVENLY.

Eat some and let me know whatchathink!

NPR WVPE Michiana Chronicle: Cargo Bike Obsessed

You can find this on WVPE website and listen to the audio by clicking HERE.

They say less is more, but I’m a girl for whom more is more.  I like things a lot.  I am zealous and easily obsessed or excitable.  I live my life well most days, but my obsessions can make me a little crazy.  I guess I am a binger.   I’m a little bingey.  I bingeth.  I am a women bingeonified.  Of course that was a word before I used it.

One of my latest obsessions has been cargo bikes.  I’ve been biking more for daily errands and thus carrying more of whatever else I might be obsessed with upon my bicycle.  My little girls are squished together in the trailer on trips to school drop off.  My front basket gets loaded down with whatever we find at the farmer’s market to eat.  I want to do even more with my bicycle. I want to pretend I am brave enough to sell our second car and do without.  A cargo bike could make that more realistic.  I have eaten, slept and dreamed about cargo bikes the past six months.  A longtail?  A box bike?  Madsen? Yuba? Xtracycle?  I’ve pinned them on Pinterest.  I’ve liked them on Facebook. I’ve test ridden them, borrowed them, drooled over them at Buck's Bike Shop.
Buck's Bike Shop gave me a passenger bike seat!

Alongside my new cargo bike obsession I am getting an education on bicycling in general. I’ve devoured two books by Elly Blue;  Bikenomics and Everyday Bicycling. I bought an extra copy so if you want to borrow it, let me know!  I’m getting more active as a voice of the mama who wants to bicycle more (and more safely) with her kids.  I’m joining local and national bicycling groups online like League of American Cyclists to learn more about bike advocacy and bike safety.

Yuba's Boda Boda I COVET.
One of the surprises I’ve discovered in my everyday riding is the valuable bicycle conversations with strangers.  They like the music I play from the handlebars--compliments of a cell phone mount and Pandora.  I often listen to Squirrel Nut Zippers or Squeeze just for sass.   I’ve had friends ask, “Do you really ride your bike to Target?”  Yes I do, I tell them.  I get to encourage them to ride more, to ride farther.  Like me, they realize it is only a mindset that they can only drive the car ‘there’.  
My Bike Pal and Expert Joshua, TOWING my hubs bike with  his Yuba

There is some planning involved to bike as transportation.  When I first biked to a place I’d only driven before, it was an adventure.  As a stay at home mama I don’t get a lot of adventure outside of scraped knees and mystery food in our refrigerator.  Embarking on my bike to the grocery store was exciting.  It was a little scary.  What if I got a flat tire?  What if I got hit by a car?  But then again, riding in the car is risky too. I also believe I am a better driver on a bicycle than in a car.  I do not take my safety for granted .  I am observant and vigilant and I pray a lot.

Who doesn't bike to the dry cleaner's?
My worries are shallower too:  What if I bought too much and couldn’t get it home on the bicycle?  This alone keeps me from shopping like I might do otherwise.  I discovered I buy less because I am biking more.  I am also saving money to buy a better, bigger bike.  A cargo bike? Or at least a Bobike child’s seat for my older daughter.  She’s 5years old now and the Bobike Junior is for kids up to ten yearsold!  It will be a safer alternative to Portia riding on my rear rack, which we call our fake cargo bike.  We had an accident with her precious foot and the spokes and I saw the value of  spending money to ride safer.  I’m remorseful and embarrassed we needed a scary accident to get me ready to spend money on quality equipment. We continue to bike and are not scared off from biking despite our mishaps.

Our Fake Cargo Bike
And then this week I drove to the gym at four-thirty a.m. because I was afraid I would not have the energy after class to bike home again.   There was an NPR piece on global warming and how birds are in danger of becoming extinct.  I felt the weight of my own responsibility to our environment.  I felt embarrassed and foolish to be so blessed that I could drive to the gym to get exercise.  I can do something to reduce global warming by biking instead of driving even once a week.  I vowed to bike to the gym next time, even at four-thirty a.m.  It is only three miles from home and I like birds a lot. Almost as much as I like…love…biking.

How to Throw a "Sing for your Supper" Olde Fashioned Dinner Party

I want to hang out with some adults and have a conversation not punctuated with "No more TV!" or "WAITAMINUTE....What are those markers, tape and stapler for?!?"   Charades and Card Games are a SNOOZE.  I'm not quite ready for Bingo Hall yet.  I have little kids, so how exactly could I throw an elegant dinner party?  (Oh yeah, and on a budget!) AND Without much effort.  I did it as a single woman, and I did it as a married mama to two little crazy monkeys: Invite your friends to a a "Sing for Your Supper" dinner party!

Back before TV and the Interweb there was such thing as conversation.  It was practically an art form.  Evenings were also filled with someone playing a piano and others joining in.  A guest may tell a colorful story or perform if they had some unique skill.  I doubt this happens in most homes today and it rarely happens in mine.  We do use cloth napkins and I probably light some candles once or twice a week but that is it.  We are missing something, friends!

Back before TV and the Interweb there was such a 
thing as conversation.

On the Daily Connoisseur blog Jennifer Stevens talks about the French way of preparing a big dinner with several leisurely courses, conversation and connectedness.  Most every night.  They listened to classical music.  Candles were lit.  Feeding wasn't a paper wrapped and styrofoam box was elegant.  I think our souls could use more of this.  Unless your soul is cringing.  If your soul cringes, simply stop reading this and go do something that makes you feel awesome, I won't be offended, I promise.  

Run along.  Go ahead, it is ok.  

OK.  For the rest of you. Use evite or email or just pick up the phone.  The more elegant and fancy you make it the more work you have to do, so whatever works for you.  Maybe you prepare the whole meal, maybe you invite folks to bring potluck.  I've done both.  Invite people to dressed own or up, although I must say the latter is usually more festive.  The key to a Sing for Your Supper dinner is you invite your guests to prepare something to present.  It can be a poem they read or recite from memory.  It can be a song sung or played. It can be a joke or series of jokes.  I had a few poetry and joke books available so if someone wasn't prepared but wanted to be involved once the fun started they could easily step into the fray.  

Usually the performances came at the end of dinner 
and before dessert...
There is a fun game for anyone who doesn't perform: "How Many Marshmallows Can You Stuff Into Your Mouth?"  Hilarious audience participation too, as we needed to count for each contender.  Keep napkins handy.

Usually the performances come at the end of dinner and before dessert, but again it is YOUR party.  Do exactly what pleases you. Candlelight and classical music cast the spell of a bygone era and I highly recommend them.  (Even if dinner, served on china plates, mais bien sur, came from paper or styrofoam containers!) And I would love to hear about your party afterwards.  Especially if you have video or photos,  Bonne Appetite!